Granny Robin's Roost

New Calling and Taxes

2011-02-13T15:02:00.000-08:00

Well, I definitely need to get better at keeping people posted about what's happening with me.

I got realeased from Primary today as the Sunbeam teacher. I was just getting to know my 4th class, and I'm really going to miss Primary, but I'm actually pretty excited about getting to know more of the sisters in the ward. I was feeling inadequate but certainly willing. Getting set apart always makes a huge difference.

I've been helping people with their taxes at Jackson Hewitt. Finished up the classes and passed everything I needed to pass, so I'm helping out in a couple of the stores. I love the face time I get with people!

I haven't been seeing a lot of the family, but I spent the night at Bryce's and then I got to see Megamind with Amie and the girls on Saturday night.

Six weeks till our family vacation to Destin!!!

Tax classes and Roaches

2010-10-14T02:32:00.000-07:00

I'm taking tax classes through Jackson Hewitt on Monday and Wednesday nights from 6:00 to 9:00. I am always the last one to finish my tests and I'm not leaving until 9:30. We haven't had books to take home and study, so it's been a challenge. I'm diggin the fact that I'll have a second income in January. I'm hoping to put together enough to get a car.

I'll be getting some shopping tips from Bryce on the car. He just traded in his truck and bought a different truck for his new side business AND a car that he can drive to work. Not sure what he paid for the truck but the car was under $3,000. Sweet!

So everybody knows that I have a paralyzing fear of roaches. You also know that I have seen the big ones that look like Transformer bugs with unnaturally large bodies that seem like tanks because you seriously can't kill them with less than a very powerful swat with the heaviest shoe you can find. Wimpy fly swatters from the Dollar Store are ineffective.

I found one of these still alive but upside-down and flailing its ugly legs on an over-turned pot I had left out to dry. I FREAKED OUT! I grabbed some bug spray that has the attached pump sprayer and left the mutant to die in a pool of poison. Yeah! It WAS STILL MOVING after all that spraying! Well, Amie and Clay came over the next day while I was at work and got rid of that one, a dead one under my bed, and another I had left by the downstairs bathroom as an example to his mutant friends of how THEY would be crushed if they showed their ugly faces.

They put some killing powder around the walls and put out roach traps. The next day Bryce told me he laid down 3 gallons of spray. I sleep snug as a bug in a rug now! Especially on Monday and Wednesday nights.

I moved!

2010-08-03T19:47:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally moved out of Amie's basement! Yay for Amie and Clay regaining their privacy! Holy smokes, I lived there for a lot longer than anybody EVER expected. I REALLY appreciate having a place to stay and I am even more thankful for this new home.

I miss the noise! I've been to dinner and home evening and I had some time to play with Lia on Sunday before we went to a farewell break-the-fast for some people moving from the ward.

Clay and Bryce were over here on Saturday helping to set up things like the washer and dryer, stove, and tv. Bryce looked like Ghostbusters over here spraying for bugs. The roaches are the HUGE flying kind. I found a dead one Sunday morning and didn't see another one until tonight. It's dead and is in the downstairs bathroom. I have to work up the courage to go get it and throw it away. I envision it coming back to life and crawling on me or flying in my face. I may have to make friends with a neighbor and see if I can convince someone else to come in here to dispose of it. OR... I can put on my Big Girl pants and just take care of it. Yeah. That's what I'll do. Tomorrow.

Tonight I'm going to watch the rest of America's Got Talent.

Tyler and Andrea's Wedding

2010-07-21T20:09:00.001-07:00

I haven't posted a thing in forever and decided that despite the lateness of the hour, I wanted to get some pictures of the wedding posted for everyone to enjoy. I think I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

I see a difference

2009-12-16T03:40:00.001-08:00

Here's a picture of me and Amie in December last year. I had actually lost a bit of weight by then. I was feeling like I had not made any progress over the last year, but I do see a difference. Here is a picture of Caetie and me ready to go see Wicked. When I went to see them for Thanksgiving, I had a girl's night out with Caetie and it was a ton of fun! I'll be posting more pics and telling you about my best vacation EVER. For now, I am just getting myself psyched to keep up with my Biggest Loser workouts through the holidays.

Telling on myself

2009-12-12T06:32:00.000-08:00

My mother called me Joan when I was growing up because she said I acted like a martyr. Yep. Joan of Arc. She would also call me Sarah, for Sarah Bernhardt, a movie star known for being melodramatic. She would put her hand on the back of her hand on her forehead and strike a pose to mock me. Man, my mother had me pegged.

So I guess, from an early age, I was trying to be manipulative to get my way. I do remember thinking that if I turned on the tears, people would feel sorry for me.

My mom would make us go out to play when I was a kid, and even though I didn’t always like it, most of the time I would be playing so hard, I would lose track of time. We had a rule that wherever you were in the neighborhood, or no matter how far you had pedaled your bike, when the street lights came on, you needed to be home.

We had a bike route we would ride that went down the Tyson’s driveway, across the street to the Rosemary Marston’s yard where we made a groove in the ditch to get around the stop sign (known in our circles as “Dead Man’s Curve”), back across to the Tyson’s yard, going back up the driveway, through the back gate, around the patio, and back through the gate to the driveway to start all over again. The hardest part for me was not Dead Man’s curve, but feeling confident enough to not lose my balance through the back gate.

The Marstons had a huge sycamore tree in their yard that hung with Spanish moss.We used the moss to build forts and armed ourselves with “sycamore balls” to stage battles And yes, we did get itchy. If I had ever seen a picture of a moss bug, I might have thought twice before covering myself in moss to hide from the enemy.

I didn’t always like being outside. When mama sent us out, we needed to really have to go to the bathroom badly or have something else seriously wrong before she would unlock the sliding glass door and let us in. One day it was unusually hot and I wanted to be inside so I threw up to “prove” to mama that I was sick. I think I could do it at will sometimes, because I definitely remember throwing up at school and getting to go home. That particular day when I "got sick" I got to go inside and sit in Daddy’s swivel recliner and watch TV, and it was so nice and cold inside, I even got a blanket. But when mama caught me making faces at the unfortunate kids who were still outside, she jerked me by the arm outta that chair, spanked my butt, and threw me outside so fast I barely had time to comprehend what had happened before I heard her tell me that I could throw up all I wanted to, but I was NOT coming back inside! It was hard to pull one over on my mother for very long.

Summer...YAY!

2009-05-30T22:06:00.000-07:00

I enjoyed Memorial Day weekend. Amy and Bryce came over for a barbecue and we got to sit outside. We had a feast of steak, watermelon, corn on the cob, smores, homemade oreo cookie ice cream and chocolate cake. Yes. I gained a little at Weight Watchers this week. *funny story coming*

I went walking with Amy on Tuesday and walked a HALF MILE! Woo hoo! Got to see Maddie, Presto, Action Jackson, and Gare Bear mid-week, so that was cool. It wasn't so bad seeing Bryce either. So Amy and I are going to be walking regularly on Tuesdays. There was a downpour on the way over, but I'm glad I stuck to the plan because we were able to get to the track. She lapped me once, but that's ok. It's just nice to get some one-on-one time with ya, Amy. *keep going.. funny stuff ahead*

Cailey had her piano recital last week. She did great! I have to figure out how to ddownload pics from my camera. When I do, I'll post some. Kendall had her ballet recital today and she was awesome. Nice cartwheel in the middle of a dance routine to "You Ain't Never Had a Friend Like Me." Faith was sick last weekend but she's better now. Clay's brother Brian is here visiting with his family. His Gracie is a clone of Faith. It's insane how much they look alike, down to their glasses.

No more suspense... Here's the funny story:

So we were all outside eating and enjoying the wonderful summer evening. Perfect weather. Clay and Brian had the kids on the trampoline and the rest of us were visiting at the table. Amie put Lia on the grass to let her crawl around, but soon realized that she may be eating something. She moved her and told us that she had been right by a dead worm. So close call, right? Well, Lia loved that grass and soon she had booked across the lawn to the edge by the trampoline. She got some playtime there, but Clay's dad brought her back over to the deck. Amie decided to give her a little more playtime on the grass, and within less than a minute I laughed and told Amie, you'd better check to see if she's eating that worm. I was only teasing, but apparently Lia had made her way right to that worm and had it in her mouth!!!!

Gnarly! Gave us all the jeebs.

Belated Birthday Post

2009-05-13T01:33:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to me! For those of you who haven't guessed, I'm not 27. I know some young grannies, but that doesn't apply to me. Amie just used what she had in her cupboard. Just so happens that you can double that and know my real age. Another odd little trivia note is that Amie and I could have used the same candles on our cakes last year.
I really appreciated the birthday party with balloons in MY FAVORITE COLOR! I was still on Atkins at the time, and Amie made me a special chocolate mousse dessert. Nice!

Relay for Life

2009-05-13T01:07:00.000-07:00

I joined Relay for Life when our bishopric encouraged us to become more active in the community. I thought that this would be a really special way to get to know some of the people better at work and help out with a worthy cause. It was amazing! Bryce helped out by offering a free 2 week cleaning that we sold raffle tickets for. We raised quite a bit of money for our team. Thank you, Doctor Carter! I also wanted to walk in the Relay as a milestone for myself. When I visited Lance and Caetie for Thanksgiving 2007, I got winded after walking just a few feet. At Relay, I wound up walking 2 miles and being on my feet for the majority of the time. We wound up getting rained out, which was very disappointing, but we still got to participate in the luminary service where they send lit lanterns into the night sky and have luminaries lit all along the track. It was very emotional and touching. I would encourage everybody to get involved next year.

A Tribute to Daddy

2009-02-15T13:43:00.000-08:00

Twenty-five years ago, I was only 28 years old. Amie was 10, Curt was 8, Bryce was only 3, Lance was just a month old, and Drew was not even born. Yesterday was the anniversary of my dad's last Valentine's Day. I remember it every year. The first 10 years were harder, and although it's true what they say about time healing all wounds, time never makes you forget or long for that last chance to say, "I love you" one more time, or "I'm sorry for not being the princess you thought I was,", or wishing for a chance to be Daddy's Little Girl one more time.

Things I miss are hearing the song, "Robin, Robin, I've been thinking, What a fine world this would be...", "Peggy! Where's my no salt!", "Who farred that shot?", "Roostus Rastus, Johnson Brown," the song, "Peanut on the Railroad Track," and him calling me Daisy Mae. I miss lying in Mama and Daddy's expansive King bed while they simultaneously watched TV and read, and getting tickled till I couldn't stand it, and laughing, and running away from that awfully scary, children-chasing gorilla he became, or watching him wiggle his ears and whistle at the same time, and listening to the song "Cool Water" with him, and making that trip to the farm before the house was completed, and snuggling under some covers in the cold car while he grilled the best burger I've ever eaten to this day, and watching Hee Haw with him, and arguing that Eric Clapton HAD to be a better guitar player than Buck Owens or Roy Clark.

I don't miss sharing ONE bathroom at the summer place in Bluffton.

He gave us a good life, and while there were things that went on behind closed doors that I was never privy to growing up, I know in my heart that my dad, The Senator, as he is known in Velociworld, worked hard to provide us with privileges of music, dance, sports, the ballet, clothes every Christmas from Rich's in Atlanta, special Disney movies about the wilderness, shopping sprees with friends, drive-in movies with red Kool-Aid and brown, butter-greasy grocery bags full of home-popped popcorn (My favorite was the double feature of "The Pit and the Pendulum" and "The Tell-Tale Heart"), homes where we could spend time on the water skiing, crabbing, fishing, and shrimping, red towels that had our names embroidered on them, and, once, a long time ago, the honor of wearing t-shirts that said, "Vote for my Daddy."

I want my children and my grandchildren to know that they have a lot to look forward to when they see him on the other side of the veil and hug him and talk with him and give out those hugs and kisses he missed in this life. I am so proud to be the daughter of Ralph Lloyd Crawford Sr.

I love and miss you, Daddy!

Happy 28th Lance!

2009-01-09T19:15:00.000-08:00

So here we are in the new year! Happy Birthday to Lance today! Yay! Here's a picture of him rockin' out with his bros when they got together at Curt's before the big family reunion. Good times! Check out my boys! Talk about mad skillz! Dude!

Give it to Mikey..... He'll eat anything!

2008-11-13T02:15:00.000-08:00

Hmmmm..... What's on the menu tonight? What can I make on the fly? Through the years I have seen some interesting things in refrigerators and freezers. We had a cow eye in the fridge when Lindy did a science project in high school. Nice! I used to go giggin' for frogs as a young newlywed. Talk about budget food! I've had to tolerate a few minor myocardial infarctions when I lived with an avid fisherman who had a habit of leaving fish heads intact. I wasn't used to opening the fidge to find something looking back at me with an open mouth that seemed to say, "How YOU doin?" I've seen my share of white butcher paper with black magic markered labels on various and sundry (and sometimes surprising!) body parts from pigs, cows, elk, and deer. I'm tellin ya, I thought I'd seen it all. But the latest thing to hit the freezer in the Dunford home has me surprised yet again...
Yep! It's Scamper! Amie noticed an odd smell that rivaled a pungent diaper in the office and when she had Clay check on Scamper, they learned that he had unfortunately died. I know they loved him, but I'm thinking taxidermy is a more viable option.
I was happy to learn that the cute little ball of fur that attacked me on the stairs one morning was not intended to be Amie's next culinary experiment to make my Atkins diet more appealing. Clay's just been waiting for his hectic schedule to allow him the time to preside over a befitting funeral for the family pet that is no more.

Good Timber

2008-11-08T03:57:00.000-08:00

The tree that never had to fight
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.

The man who never had to toil
To gain and farm his patch of soil,
Who never had to win his share
Of sun and sky and light and air,
Never became a manly man
But lived and died as he began.

Good timber does not grow with ease:
The stronger wind, the stronger trees;
The further sky, the greater length;
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.

Where thickest lies the forest growth,
We find the patriarchs of both.
And they hold counsel with the stars
Whose broken branches show the scars
Of many winds and much of strife.
This is the common law of life.

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Ghoulies and Ghosties and Long-legged Beasties

2008-11-01T19:25:00.000-07:00

"From ghoulies and ghosties and long-legged beasties, and things that go bump in the night, good Lord deliver us."

This has been one of my favorite Halloweens in a long time. I guess it's because I got to experience first-hand through the eyes of some of my grandchildren that excitement that builds all month long. Amie and Clay started things off with a Halloweenie Roast on a Friday when it rained all day. Poor Clay was out in the rain mowing the lawn, and the rain never did let up. It ended up being a ton of fun. Clay grilled the hot dogs, they set up a jump house in the garage for maybe 25 kids who showed up, and by dang they DID get a fire going in the barbecue pit for the marshmallow roast.

I decided to decorate my desk for work. Amie carved the pupkin for me during a Family Home Evening, and I made some spiders out of pipe cleaners and googly eyes. I had the most decorated desk at the office. I especially liked the black garbage bags I laid for the foundation. You can't see the sign I had that said, "Watch out for flying monkeys."

So on Tuesday before Halloween, we had a chance to dress in our costumes and go to the church for Trunk or Treat. Here's the whole crew:

Amie went as Giselle:

Here I am as a witch. When I dressed up for work, I painted my nails black.

Take one more look at the group: Who is that Mullet Man? And did you see the princess, the cute witch, and the 2 kitty cats?(hint: one is fast asleep)

When I get a chance, I'll have to show you the pics Amy took of Madison, Preston, and Jackson on Halloween. Madison was a bride, Preston was a soldier, and Jackson was the cutest puppy I've ever seen! I sat at the bottom of the driveway all decked out in my witch's garb to hand out candy to the kiddies, and I had a ton of fun! It did get pretty cold, though. There was hot chocolate for everybody when it was all over.

3's and 8's - My response to being tagged

2008-10-05T06:02:00.000-07:00

3's and 8's

3 Joys
1. My children
2. My grandchildren
3. My sibs

3 Fears:
1. Dying in a fire
2. Drowning
3. Belinda’s house without haint blue shutters

3 Obsessions:
1. Swimming
2. Atkins
3. Movies

3 Surprising facts:
1. I was a cheerleader
2. I played center guard on the basketball team in school
3. I won a doubles tennis tournament in college

8 Things I'm passionate about:
1. Seeing the good in others
2. Force – Hate it!
3. The death penalty (I have a solution for Californians who think it’s inhumane. There was a case in 2006 of a guy who had brutally killed a high-school girl. One of my friends had known her. There was a lot of press about how it was inhumane for him to undergo lethal injection because … Wait for it… HE WOULD FEEL THE PAIN OF THE NEEDLE!!! So my first thought was that he wouldn’t have cared about that pain if he was diabetic and needed that daily insulin! And here’s my solution: Drive a gang of death row buddies out to the desert once a month. Tie them securely to a chair and drive away. No needles… No human interaction to cause their death… Just them and God. Each month, the next ones get the special effect of seeing others get carted off to the morgue before they take the deceased’s place. No political infractions and cost-effective, too!)
4. Garage sales
5. Old books
6. Music
7. Comedy
8. Reverse discrimination – I hate it! I shouldn’t have to cross a language barrier of any kind if I haven’t left the country. State and federal governments need to figure out that the same laws they put into place to avoid discrimination have only advanced it. People who move here should not be accommodated in any way. You know where you’re coming, so YOU make the adjustments. And, by the way, I don’t want to have to keep hearing how I owe anybody anything because of travesties that happened IN THE PAST. Build a bridge and GET OVER IT.

8 words or phrases I say often:
1. Dude
2. I’m just sittin’ here lookin’ like this
3. Nekkified (as in, What are you doin’ all nekkified, Faith?)
4. Is my music on? (At the pool, I get to listen to music when I swim)
5. It’s hot in here
6. Hello Lil Boo Boo Dey, which was recently changed to, Hello little Doo Doo Day (I started calling Lia Boo Boo Dey, until I noticed the number of dirty diapers ( I have to mention here that when I was young, we were not allowed to sing the Boo Boo Dey song, because of the ugly part and the part where it says Mama tells them to shut up their mouth. My mother hated that. I can’t help it. It stuck. So I don’t mean anything bad by it when I say it.
7. Poo Tinky Feet (This started with Faith. One day I grabbed her foot and put it up to my face and said, “Ewwww! Poo tinky feet!” Now I do it with all my grandkids. When I come home from work, Faith will just lie down on the floor for me to get her feet. And Jackson is fun to do that with. I love how he crinkles up his nose when he laughs when I do it. Guess y’all better be ready for Granny Robin when you come for your visit, Andersin, Laycie, and Masen!
8. Bah choo! (When I sneeze, that’s what it sounds like)

8 Things I want to do before I die:
1. Get to my goal weight
2. Get remarried
3. Write a book
4. See Paris again
5. Have my own place
6. Water ski again
7. Snow ski
8. Go on a mission

8 Things I pray for:
1. Drew
2. Willpower
3. For my will to match Heavenly Father’s will
4. Grace under fire
5. Gratitude for all of my blessings
6. To have unconditional acceptance of others
7. To forgive people who give me a reason to cry

8 Things I've learned:
1. You can’t force anyone to do anything
2. There is something good in every person
3. Fear is the opposite of love
4. Everybody has a Gethsemane
5. To forgive others and myself
6. I don’t control anything
7. The Atonement was for me, too
8. Laugher IS the best medicine

8 People I tag:
1. Lance
2. Bryce
3. Amie
4. Drew
5. Curtis
6. Lindy
7. Kim
8. Anybody else who will play along

Celebrity Collage by MyHeritage

2008-10-03T19:09:00.001-07:00

MyHeritage: Celebrity Collage - Free genealogy software - Family tree charts

2008-09-18T17:53:00.000-07:00

Some Candid Shots

2008-09-13T20:31:00.000-07:00

Thought I would post some recent pictures.
This first one shows how much Faith (3) loves helping Amie with Lia. What you don't see in this picture is how Faith kisses on Lia whenever she gets the chance. Her curly hair must tickle Lia's face, and the poor thing is defenseless, except to cry when she's had enough.

Cailey will turn 8 on November 29th and is preparing to be baptized. She plays the piano, was on the swim team this summer, and is currently reading Nancy Drew The Hidden Staircase. As I understand it, Cailey is also a Fairy. She and Kendall were arguing the other day because I believe Cailey was using her Fairy powers to get the upper hand over Kendall.

Kendall (6)is one of the most limber girls I know. Last year she was in gymnastics and ballet. This year, she is taking ballet and tap. She also swam on the swimteam this summer. By the way, Kendall loves butterflies.

A Ghost Story

2008-09-13T19:10:00.000-07:00

My sister Belinda and her family went to Scotland for a couple of weeks and I house-sat for her. The first Saturday night I spent was fairly uneventful, except that I realized at 4:45 a.m. Sunday morning, the back door was open and one of the cats came in from being outside during the night. I didn't open the door. George, the cat, woke me up and I realized then that the door was ajar. Belinda tells me that she needs to get her door fixed. I think she has a bigger problem.

So last Saturday, I headed up to Lindy's again and got there in the afternoon. There was a car parked by her mailbox and I immediately thought that my cousin Cathy was there. When I went in the front door, I noticed flip flops under the coffee table, so I yelled upstairs, "Hey, Cathy! I didn't know I was going to have company!"

No answer.

I realized then that she wasn't there. I let the cats out and went oustside and watered her plants around the house. I watched a couple of movies and started playing a game on the computer. At about 7:45 p.m. the lights flickered and went out, and the TV turned off. The computer wasn't affected. About 5 seconds later, the lights and the TV came back on and I immediately heard a crash upstairs, as if someone had knocked things off a bedside table. That was followed by the sound of footsteps above me, as if someone was scrambling to maybe pick up the items that had fallen, or that he/she was headed downstairs. I called out, "Cathy! Man, you sleep like the dead! You coming down?"

No answer.

My body went into panick mode. You know. Heart racing while it's in the pit of your stomach. I called up the stairs one more time, "Cathy?"

No answer.

At this point my mind is moving like the speed of light and I think to myself, "Don't do what they do in the movies." I grabbed the phone and immediately left, barefooted, and called Cathy. She wasn't home, so I left her a message. Something to the effect of, "I heard somebody in the house and I'm totally freaked out." and walked immediately to the neighbors and rang their bell. They weren't home. I walked back to Belinda's driveway and then I saw the other neighbor pulling into her driveway with her boyfriend. I walked over and introduced myself and told them what had happened. The boyfriend went upstairs and all through the house and didn't see anything or anybody. That made me feel a little better. He told me I should call the cops anyway, so I did. I also called Cathy again from my cell.

I sat in the dining room waiting for the police. I swear I heard foosteps above me again. I ran out the front door and the police were coming up the driveway. He went through the entire house, and asked if there were animals. Rex and George, the 2 cats, both came in while the policeman was there, so I know they weren't up there causing that commotion. I would have heard the bells on their collars anyway.

I gathered all my things, locked up the doors and left when the police did. I wasn't going to stay there alone. By now I was convinced it was a ghost. Don't care what you think or say. No other explanation in my mind.

I called Kim when I was en route home and he told me I needed to call Cathy so she could take a Quija board over there. He told me that Lindy's house was one of the TB houses from the 1920's. Made me feel a lot better... About LEAVING!

Well, Cathy called me back. She said that there was static during both of my messages to her, but she could tell I was scared out of my mind. She convinced me to go back and she canceled her plans and stayed the night. She was brave enough to go upstairs, but I wasn't.

Lindy's getting Haint Blue paint for Christmas.

God remembered Rachel

2008-09-11T05:45:00.000-07:00

I realized once I started losing weight how much my being overweight affected the lives of my children. Our church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints , sponsors "The Addiction Recovery" program that follows the 12 Step program but incorporates LDS beliefs. About a year before I got the opportunity to go see Lance in Missouri, and to eventually move in with Amie and her family here in Georgia, I was privileged to participate in that program. I realized then that my overeating was my addiction, and that if I wanted my will to match Heavenly Father's will for me, I needed to make some major changes. So, for about a year, I prayed and tried to work that program. I learned a lot about myself but in the process of self-realization, I was learning that I had to take responsibility for my actions, and that's where it was getting really difficult for me. I underwent a knee surgery in April 2007 that further incapacitated me. I walked with a walker through July, and continued to gain weight.

I was miserable, but continued to pray for help. I was suffering physically and financially. My daughter Amie was going through a hard time, also, and was asking the Lord for another baby. In the October 2007 General Conference we heard a promise in the talk "Claim the Exceeding Great and Precious Promises". In that talk, Spencer J. Condie, when relating the story of how Rachel wearied the Lord for a child, he said: '“And God remembered Rachel” And just as God remembered Rachel, God will remember you.' That promise struck deep into my heart, and I claimed it for myself and for my daughter.

A break for me came when Lance flew me out to Missouri to visit him and his beautiful family. I hadn't seen the children in 2 years. I was mortified to admit to Lance that he would have to purchase an extra seat for me on the plane. The previous year, a company flew me out to San Diego for a training and when I showed up to check in for the return trip, the ticket agent told me I would have to purchase a second seat because, "Ma'am, you won't fit in only one seat." I had to admit to Lance that I was even bigger now, and I didn't want to be embarrassed in front of strangers if that happened again.

So, Lance, I'm sorry you had to incur that extra cost on my behalf. Once I got there, Lance explained that it was literally "Do or Die time" for me. He said that as an anesthesiologist, he just doesn't see people get to be my age and as big as I got. They die. He told me that every year he kept hearing my empty promises of how I was going to lose weight, and every time he got to see me again, he was disappointed, because I would be even bigger. He told me that he didn't believe that I would actually lose the weight this time either. So Lance, I'm sorry that I broke your sofa AND your trust in me. I want you to believe in me again.

And I still think about how much I made Drew suffer because of my decision to overeat. I learned that he constantly worried whether I would die in my sleep at night cause he could hear my erratic breathing. AND, I constantly hounded him to just go get things for me because it was hard for me to get my fat butt out of a chair or off the sofa. I just kept sitting there... eating more and more... getting fatter and fatter... Just spiralling into a depression that was actually killing me right in front of him. And now I know how cruel it was of me to do that to him. Drew, I am so sorry.

In December 2007, Brother Condie's promise came to fruition. I took a leap of faith and left California to go live with Amie and her family, and Amie was pregnant with Lia. As a side note, her name means "weary" because, like Rachel, Amie wearied the Lord to have her. I have to tell you how much Amie and her wonderful husband Clay have done to promote my weight loss. Clay went on the Atkins Diet with me for moral support and for Christmas, they bought me a membership at Georgia Aquatic Center so I could swim and do water aerobics. They have given me not just a roof over my head, but a home, for which I am eternally thankful.

I definitely see the correlation between what my children have done for me and what the Savior did for us all in the Garden of Gethsemanee. Thank you, Drew, Lance, Amie and Clay, and all of my other family, for your love and support. Every time I get in the pool, I thank God for all of you. I pray every time I'm swimming and working out that I will have the stamina, the courage, and the will to continue to make good choices to keep up this program.

To anyone who reads this who needs to make a change in their life, and who may have given up hope that there is a way to accomplish a goal, I extend to you my testimony that God lives, that He hears our pleadings, and that, as He remembered Rachel, He will remember you.

Atlanta's Biggest Loser?

2008-09-09T18:56:00.001-07:00

I am entering a contest sponsored by Atlanta and Company, a show on Atlanta's Channel 11. I swear that at one point I must have weighed over 400 pounds, and I know it wasn't easy for Lance to wheel me around Walmart in a freaking wheelchair because it was so difficult for me to walk. God knows that the trip Drew and I took last Thanksgiving to visit Lance and Caetie was my wake-up call. Like Lance and Amie told me.... "It's do or die time." Just wanted to post these pics and let you know that even if I am not chosen to participate in this contest, I am going to keep up my own crusade to LOSE THIS WEIGHT.

So I'm posting the pic of me showing my muscle (it's a start) and the following poem:

Look at me! Look at me! Look at me now!
I can lose weight. I just have to know how.
I’ve lost almost 80.
I’m 1/3 of the way.
I read of your contest
And cried out…. Hey! Hey!
This is it! These are Pros!
They know what they’re doing!
They’ll whip me in shape.
All the guys will come wooing.
They’ll teach me new dance steps,
And a new way to eat.
I’ll keep off the pounds,
And be light on my feet.
I’ll train with the best, even if I get sore.
They’ll work out my biceps and triceps and more.
I’ll sit on one seat of a plane with one strap.
I’ll play with the grand-kids.
Wow! I’ll have a lap!
I’ll walk without resting every 500 feet.
I’m going to play tennis again. Isn’t that neat?
When it’s over I’ll amaze all my family and friends.
There are those who lack faith,
But I’ll show them who wins!
My name is Robin Wininger and I want to be Atlanta’s next Biggest Loser.

Wish me luck!

Ibid.

2008-09-04T16:51:00.000-07:00

Do you ever get the feeling of Deja-Vu? If I were writing my memoirs, I would be referring you back to a previous page. It's been too short a time to refer you back to a whole chapter. Let me get you up to date. Since December 2007:

Unemployment Line: 4

Robin: 3

I'm just been sitting here looking like this

2008-08-31T10:30:00.000-07:00

I have been telling myself for a couple of weeks that I need to post a blog. I've found a million other things to do instead. Let me tell you a few of them.

I've been getting up earlier each morning so that I could start back on my swimming routine. I've lost 74 pounds since December, and I believe that one of the catalysts that has helped me the most is exercise. When I first started, I couldn't finish a lap. Now I'm up to 12 laps added to my water aerobic routine. Now I've been doing only breast stroke, because that is the easiest for me. Freestyle has just been too physically demanding; however, I am determined to make that happen, so I started adding in laps of that stroke. My heart rate goes up to 220 vs. the regular 180 with breast stroke. I can do 1 1/2 freestyle laps without drowning. Yay!

I am absolutely loving my job! My hours are from 8:30 till 5:30 M-F, but after my 90 day probation, I'll be working from 9 till noon on an occasional Saturday. I'm handling more responsibility now and renewed a Commercial account all by myself! I love Underwriting negotiations and schmoozing to save people money.

Mondays are hectic because by the time I get home, dinner is usually underway and we have Family Home Evening. I love it! Right now Amie is focusing on getting Cailey ready for her baptism, so last Monday she had a hide and seek game with quetions about baptism scattered around the room. The girls had found nearly all of them before we actually had the lesson, but it was still fun. I have to say that even though there are moments when things are not exactly reverent or perfect, I am impressed with Amie's diligence in making this happen on a regular basis. All she has to do is break out into the "This is the night we've waited for, Always a treat we have in store, We love each other more and more, With every Family Night!" and Faith will come running from wherever she is in the house to stand on the hearth to direct the music. At prayer time, Amie sings, "Let us gather in a circle, And kneel for family prayer," and the girls get within hugging room of her and each other and I get to hear innocent, powerful, and life-altering prayers ascend to heaven. How lucky am I?

Bryce and Amy came over a couple of weeks ago to have Home Evening together. School had already started, so they couldn't stay for a long time. Its been great having them close by too. I've been to their house for their regular Friday Night Movie Night, and I've been there to babysit of occasion and to get skunked by Maddy in Memory. I've seen them go through the nightly routine of prayer time as well, and seen and heard first hand their sweet prayers. It's very humbling and an experience to let you know that your life has meaning.

It's pretty sweet that Preston has been in my Primary class, but today is his last day. Amy taught the class because I'm house-sitting for Lindy in Atlanta. She, Scott, Katie, and Tyler went to Scotland for 2 weeks and I'm hanging here on the weekends. I can't wait till they get back and I get to hear about everything they saw and did! My cousin Cathy came over to hang and we were able to relax and shoot the breeze and seem to always reminisce.

Kim came up with a great idea to have a Crawford family reunion. Looks like we're planning it for November. A lot will be happening during that month: Cailey will be turning 8 and getting baptized, Lance, Caetie, Andersin, Laycie, and Masen wil be visting, and Drew will be coming out for a visit, too! I am so stoked!!!!

What's your name?

2008-08-02T07:51:00.000-07:00

I went to lunch with some friends yesterday and the question was posed, "What was your nickname when you were growing up?" It was so cool to hear all of the different responses. I thought it would be even more fun to post my responses and hear back from whoever would like to share.

I have 4 sibs so I'm sure I got called a lot of things, and, to be honest, my first remembrance was a negative moniker. I also remember ALL of the "Batman and Robin", "Robin Hood,", and "Robin Redbreast" jabs; however, the nickname that stands out in my mind is what my dad used to call me... Daisy Mae. Daddy's favorite comic strip was Lil Abner. Daisy Mae was Lil Abner's girlfriend. I think it might have been because she wore cutoff shorts and I did too. Who knows?

These days it's hard to know how to sign an email to all my friends and family. I'm known as Madre, Mom, Mama, Maja, Granny Robin, Robbie, Rob, Chica, Maggie, and Sister Wininger.

Do you know Miss Lissa, Little Wayne, Brycer Ricer, Lancer Man, and Bebo?

The Darker the (K)night...

2008-07-29T17:35:00.000-07:00

So I went to see The Dark Knight and I loved it! One of the guys from work commented that it dragged, due to subplots, but I don't agree with that. I loved the sub-plots, because they helped to build the story. The other thing Will said was that Batman (Christian Bale) has a lisp. I found myself watching his mouth every time he spoke! LOL

The action scenes were great, but I have to say that I loved how Heath Ledger played The Joker's character. The movie allows you to really get inside his demented head. I love that you get enough background to know WHY the characters are making the choices they make. Again, to me, this makes the length of the movie ok, because rather than dragging you're taken on an emotional ride. That's my take, anyway.

The only other thing I'll say is that at times I wanted to laugh at the way Batman changed his voice so that people wouldn't figure out that he's Batman. There were a few times it was really funny. I would have LOVED to have seen this movie with Drew. I would also love to hear Joel McHale's (The Soup)comments, but I think the only way that will happen is if G4 mentions it during The Feed.

Letting Go

2008-07-27T19:27:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to take a moment to tell you about a lesson I had in my Relief Society meeting at church when I was living in California. We were counseled to remember that the central theme of all of our lessons revolves around doing the will of the Father and making sure that we do all we can to make our own wills match His will for us. The lesson was based on a talk by Patricia Holland in the June 1984 Ensign, entitled, "Fruits of Peace".

Fear makes us feel exposed, defenseless, vulnerable, and unprotected, like being naked. The opposite of fear is faith, bravery, and courage; however, charity, the pure love of Christ, is at the root of all of those, and increases our ability to overcome fear.

The question was posed, "How many of you would run into a burning building?" Nobody raised her hand. Then, "How many of you would run into a burning building if your child was inside?" and, as you can imagine, everyone's hands shot up. Charity makes us brave. Perspective, or seeing others as Christ sees them, changes our perception.

Women are their own worst enemies. We compete with and compare ourselves to other women. That makes us afraid and fearful that we are not good enough or that we don't measure up. We need to be more generous and loving to ourselves. This fear and competition impedes our progress, and keep us from using our fullest capacity to love. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others, because what someone else needs may not be what you need in order to become like Christ.

We are born with charity, but fear is learned. We learned to fear as children and many times teach fear to our children. We have to work to love. Our desire to love promulgates His help. There are 3 exercises we can do to gain charity:

Forgiveness: If we do not forgive, we will not be forgiven. Matt 5:43-48. Grudges are like us drinking poison and then expecting someone else to die.

Unconditional Acceptance of Others: If we want to be accepted by others, how can we do less? Often we think of love like currency. We spend it and expect love in return. But charity is more like paint, because we can give charity and paint whatever we want our environment to be.

Give without thought of receiving: Others cannot fill or satisfy us. When we love freely without recompense, we will be filled with the Spirit.

We were issued a challenge to give without expecting anything in return for a week. I tried it, and it brought a more peaceful atmosphere into my home.

I have been living with my daughter, Amie, and her family for 7 months now. I know that all of us believed that I would be out on my own by now, and in my own place; however, things have worked out differently. I have begun comparing myself to other women my age who are retired, or who don't have to work, or who have been married nearly 30 years by now, or who have their own homes. I SO needed to be reminded of this lesson.

Something else was brought to my attention that really helped me this week. With all of that negative comparing I was doing, I started feeling badly about my exes being involved in the lives of my children. Living in California for so many years, away from most of my children, made me very unaware of how much my children are involved in their dads' lives. So I was reading in Chapter 4 of II Nephi and came across a passage that really made me stop and think.

So at this point, Lehi has finished blessing all of his children, and Nephi is remarking about how he feels after he has prayed to the Lord and become acutely aware of his many blessings:
27 And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy? 28 Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.

So I realized that I am still harboring ill feelings about my exes because I never got closure and was treated so poorly. I started thinking that my children should be mad at these men, too, because of the way they treated their mother. Ha! Ha!

Well, of course, now you can see that the Lord was very good to me in making this particular scripture stand out in bold upon my heart. He helped me to remember that lesson in love as well. It's time for me to let go of the past and rejoice in the future. I need to stop comparing my situation with theirs (my exes') and just love every moment I have with my children, but also make every day a positive experience toward my eventual exaltation. That's my goal, anyway. A work in progress, but realizing that you're heading in the right direction is half the battle.

Better Late than Never

2008-04-21T18:03:00.000-07:00

Here I am at last! A bit behind the times, but here, nonetheless. I am not as much a writer as my siblings and my children are, and I'm not sure if I am as witty as they are, but I do have a voice and I want my grandchildren and those who decide to visit to have a way of knowing what I'm thinking. It's a good way to journal.

My brother, Kim, has been Velociman in his Velociworld, where the rubber meets the road, for years now. He has certainly been the family pioneer in this world of blogging and had to learn the language in order to create his Velocihaven. I love it that he continues to take the world to our past, tells stories that I don't remember, and some that I do, and that he continues to let us get into his head if we dare.

My sons have been encouraging me to get with the times and I finally took the plunge. Now I just need to get some pictures. Mother's Day is on the way.... Hmmm.... Perhaps a digital camera is in order.